... if you're a jerk.

I’ve been thinking a lot about greatness lately. The next greatest writer hasn’t been discovered yet. We haven’t heard about the next greatest musician. The greats get known by the people they surround themselves with. When you surround yourself with greatness the greatness spreads. 

There are greats out there who will never be known beyond their own small circle and bedroom walls. It’s kindness that leads you to success. It's kindness that spreads greatness.

People don’t want to work with jerks. While the jerks may find some success, their success will fade as their names get affixed to sentences like, “What ever happened to __________?” or “Oh ya, I remember _______________ who had that song. I heard he was a jerk.”

I don’t believe it’s because they run out of new songs or opportunities to perform. The well dries up because their name sours when heard within their industry - because they treated people poorly. Because they became a jerk. 

Think of your own life. The people who are good tend to stick around and become successful. You remember the jerks but you have little regard or care for them. It’s not right to hold grudges but we do. It’s better to forgive and move on from the jerks. Kill em with kindness, as they say.

And so the greats are typically the kind. They are the ones who reflect upon their careers and the people who raised them to where they are today. The greats are the mentors who are willing to help the newbies. The greats are the ones who share what they have learned. The greats treat everyone equally regardless of their status or job titles.

The best in the world may never be discovered because of the way they treat people. Their name can be tarnished within a community or an industry forever. We may never know the greatest writer, actor, chef, doctor...

I was reminded of this when working at a music festival recently. I spent a considerable amount of time with one of the organizers who confided in me about certain artists who would never be invited back. They explained how certain artists are no longer working because they are known within the industry as jerks.

Would you want to do business with a jerk? Would you hire a jerk? 

And if you are seeking greatness…it’s wise to remember this. Treat them with kindness because kindness spreads. You may not be the best in the world at what you do, but your phone will ring before the jerk's. 

Image credit: welzen.org

It's my 45th birthday tomorrow. I still can't believe I'm getting so close to 50. I've been reflecting on my life for the last couple of weeks. I slowly journaled these forty-five lessons that I have learned so far. I'm sure I'm forgetting some but here's what I came up with. I hope these help you too. 

45 Things I've Learned So Far...

1. Your family is first. I do everything to spend time with my kids and Heather. 
2. People need people. Find your tribe(s).
3. Unplug more often. Do Not Disturb and Airplane Mode are your friends.
4. Trust people. I’ve struggled with this in the past. Nice guys get burned too often, but it still pays to be nice. It's part of the reason I launched Networking For Nice People.
5. Invest in yourself. Buy that book, go watch a movie, see a concert… you need this.
6. Take walks. I miss living in a big city and walking everywhere. I still try to walk for thirty minutes each day. I love exploring new cities on foot too. 
7. Drink water and measure how much you’re drinking (or not drinking). I thought I was drinking much more than I was before buying a bottle that has the quantity written on it.
8. Travel. Life is too short not too. Traveling was the best decision I ever made.
9. Smile. Think about your resting face. If you walk around smiling you will find strangers smile back at you. 
10. Read more. I am still not where I want to be with reading but I’m working on it. 
11. What doesn’t get measured doesn’t improve. Set measurable goals. You won't know you're succeeding (or failing) without doing this.
12. Find something you’re passionate about and pursue it. This doesn’t mean quit your job. You can always follow passions on the side. 
13. Don't let failure get you down. The fact that you tried at all is key. You learn from your missteps and apply them moving forward to success.
14. Party hard before you have kids. If you party after having kids you're being a jerk. Stop it.
15. Be a good person. Look for ways to serve the people in your life.
16. Treat people the way you want to be treated. My mum taught me this.
17. Don’t fear asking. I interviewed over fifty successful people on my last podcast and found this to be common among them. Ask yourself, "What is the worst thing that will happen if the person says, no."
18. Transcribe what you learn. I've been doing this on this blog and in my journal. I find writing down key things I learn from books and podcasts helps me retain the information. 
19. Experiences over things. Heather and I have adopted this as our family motto. 
20. Share what you know. You know much more than you think. We often sell ourselves short. Nobody else has your combination of knowledge and experience. 
21. Believe in yourself but don’t get pig-headed about it. 
22. Keep track of the good people in your life and reach out. 
23. As we get older it gets more difficult to connect in-person. I have come to accept this.
23. Be the change you want to see. Armchair politics and internet protesting can only do so much. Pick up the phone and call your politicians. Show up and protest. 
24. Follow your heart not your friends. I followed my friends as they became successful and suddenly realized I neglected my heart (and my head).
25. Make art. You’re an artist. 
26. Crank it to 11. Seriously, I embarrass myself driving alone, but I must have the tunes cranked. It’s usually punk rock stuff. 
27. Schedule your annual physical around your birthday so you never forget. A friend died at 48 years old because he didn’t realize he had had a previous heart attack. You won’t know if you don’t go. 
28. Write a journal. Fill it up and start another one. I fall out of this habit too often but I start again.
29. Use a daily To Do list. Write it down on paper. Paper is key. You can keep it in front of you all day. Plus, you get the added bonus of physically scratching items off your list. Feels good.
30. Hire someone to do something. You can’t do it all. I am not a gardener.
31. Your friends won’t always have time for you. Life gets in the way.
32. It’s normal to get lonely, embrace it and be thankful for the people in your life.
33. Everything won’t always go swimmingly sometimes you will want to drown. Don’t sink too much, but float around down there for a bit and enjoy the view.
34. Find music that makes you happy. It’s usually the stuff from when you were younger. Classic rock and punk rock make me happy.
35. Admit defeat in a day. Start again tomorrow.
36. Think more about the future than the past. I’m way too nostalgic. By thinking about the future I have found myself getting much closer to achieving my goals.
37. Note how a person treats a server.
38. Take many photos. You will be glad you did later. I love flipping through my Instagram feed.
39. Don’t give everything away or you won’t eat. 
40. Decaf in the afternoon. 
41. Keep a two drink maximum or don’t drink at all. Easier said than done, trust me, I know.  
42. Take a Myers Briggs personality self-assessment. Be honest with yourself and the results.
43. Try not to judge people. Consider why they could be behaving the way they are instead. What part of the story could you be missing? 
44. Eat fruits and veggies like it's going out of style. 
45. Stretch. I've neglected this far too much in my life. I have my chronic back pain to show for it. Stop and stretch more often. 

I hope you can use these and apply them to your own life.

For the last three years the spot where my lawn used to be has featured a pile of dirt and weeds. The closest I got to receiving “Yard of the Month” was when the sign blew over to my yard from my neighbor’s lush garden. I figured it would be an act of God before I would ever win that thing.

Each year I have tried in vain to regrow my lawn. I have purchased seed, soil, a manual push aerator, a mechanical aerator (which was really embarrassing to try to operate). 

After seeding my lawn, I would spend mornings dodging my poorly positioned sprinkler. I would drag it from spot to spot with the hose kinked, leaving me just enough time to hop out of its way before the water would angrily explode out of the end. Most of my attempts would leave me damp and sometimes downright soaked. 

Last fall, I decided to bite the bullet and hire a lawn service. Guess what happened… my lawn returned. I thought it was a lost cause but it was me who was the lost cause. I had to accept that I am not a gardener. 

“I AM NOT A GARDENER.”

This morning, I stood in the middle of my yard in awe at my success (albeit hired success). The cool, fresh grass shot up between my toes. I proudly stared around my gloriously green yard. It’s really rather magnificent. 

This dreadfully domestic moment helped me remember that I am not an expert in everything. As I approach my forty-fifth birthday, I now understand there are perfectly acceptable occasions to hire a professional. 

Back in January, I came to a similar realization when I hired a designer to create a logo, typeface and color palette for a project. It felt so good to see her handy-work and realize that I never could have produced something so good - no matter how much I watered and seeded it. 

It's funny how you learn a few things as you get older.

I have had the good fortune of spending time with best-selling author, speaker trainer, and keynote speaker Michael Port. He is a warm, wise, and sincere guy - my kind of people! 

I recently read and loved his best-selling book, Book Yourself Solid: The Fastest, Easiest, and Most Reliable System for Getting More Clients Than You Can Handle Even if You Hate Marketing and Selling. I have already seen an increase in new consulting clients as a result of reading and working through the excerises in his book.

Here are some of my takeaways from Book Yourself Solid. I encourage you to pick up a copy and dig right in today.

17 Takeaways From Book Yourself Solid

• You are the company you keep. 

I've read this in many of my favorite business and self-help-type books. It's true. Choose your friends wisely. Ditch them if they don't support you.

• Your ideal clients are those individuals who energize and inspire you. 

This is why I typically work with small business owners and teams. It always seems like small businesses are the most passionate about the work they do. That passion always gets me excited to serve them.

• Being everything to everyone just isn't possible. 

I'm guilty of trying to please all of the people all of the time - in the past. Michael serves his readers a good reminder of why this doesn't work.

• It’s much easier to carve out a very lucrative domain for yourself once you’ve identified a specific target market. 

This is something I have been doing with NetworkingForNicePeople.com. I wrote my book all about networking, so I have returned to the topic to teach and build a community. My target market is anyone who wants to jumpstart their career or grow their business. 

• If your potential clients are going to purchase your services and products, they must see them as investable opportunities; they must feel that the return they receive is greater than the investment they made.

• The secret to having a successful business is to know what your clients want and deliver it. 

• People buy results and the benefits of those results. So think about the solutions you offer and the subsequent results and benefits they provide.

• View yourself as a leader in your client’s life.

• Your brand is about making yourself known for your skills and talents. More than that — your brand is about what you stand for.

• Establish an advisory board.

I'm finally in the process of making this happen officially in a private mastermind. 

• Read one book a month.

You'll know I did this from reading these mini book-report posts.

• When you have made the effort to speak and write directly to your ideal client, he’ll feel it.

• Perform daily tasks that will keep your name in front of potential clients.

I do this with my writing here, at Networking For Nice People, in my email newsletters, and in my column in The Tennessean. I also use a CRM to remind me to check-in with clients and follow-up. 

• From a practical perspective there may be two simple reasons why you don’t have as many clients as you’d like: Either you don’t know what to do to attract and secure more clients; or You know what to do but you’re not actually doing it.

Guilty as charged with not doing what I knew I needed to be doing. I'm getting better at holding myself accountable, though. The photos of my family in my office help keep me focused. 

• Each day, introduce two people within your network who do not yet know each other but you think might benefit from knowing each other. 

I do this with my Daily Goals Worksheet. You can grab a copy here. 

• Start by choosing one day of the week that you can focus on where and when you could be asking for referrals.

• Instead of focusing on what I do, focus on what I can do for my clients.

Get a Copy of Book Yourself Solid

I pulled each of these quotes from Michael Port's valuable book because they stood out to me. I expect many (if not all) will stand out to you too.

Book Yourself Solid is a must-read book to help you grow your business. Michael Port is definitely somebody you should be following. 
 

Do you remember John Hughes’ movies from the 1980s and 1990s? The plot often included two best friends seeking love from impossible partners. SPOILER ALERT. The climax of the films often resulted in the two friends realizing it was each other who they loved all along. I love a happy ending too.

For the last year, I have bounced around a bunch of different topics to write about and explore. The subjects include: relationships, personal branding, entrepreneurship, social media, content marketing, creativity, and all of these things come back to one main passion - networking. You know I hate cheesy networking tactics and events. I believe in the true power of connection as a result of networking well - as nice people.

It has been three years since my book, New Business Networking, came out. I continue to speak and train people on how to become better networkers. We all need networking in our lives.

If you have a fledgling start-up and you need customers or investors… you need networking.
If you are a student (or parent of a student) trying to jumpstart your career… you need networking.
If you are a professional who is seeking a career change or reinvention… you need networking.
If you are between jobs after a layoff… you need networking.

INTRODUCING NETWORKING FOR NICE PEOPLE

One of my goals for 2017 is to build a brand new community around the topic of networking called Networking For Nice People. I have written a manifesto about what networking means to me. I invite you to come and take a look. You will also find a new email newsletter to send you one quick and valuable networking tip each Monday and Friday. Drop over now to check it out.

Happy 2017. Are you ready to become a better writer?

In order to build and grow your personal brand you must create content online that people can discover. It is this content that will tell the reader more about you, your products and your services. We write articles, proposals, blog posts, emails, Facebook updates, tweets and more every day. We are all writers.

One of my resolutions is to become a better writer this year. I decided to re-read Ann Handley's wonderful book, "Everybody Writes: Your Go-To Guide to Creating Ridiculously Good Content." Whether you are a scribbler or a scribe, a poet or an editor, there is something in Handley's book for all.

The following are quotes from the book that will leave you inspired and ready to improve your own writing this year.

20 ways to become a better writer

1. Write with economy and style and honest empathy for your reader.
2. If you stripped your branding from all your properties and lined up your words alongside a competitor's, would you recognize yourself? Would you stand out?
3. Whenever possible, specify geranium instead of flower.
4. Utility x Inspiration x Empathy = Quality Content.
5. Writing is a habit, not an art. Set aside time each day when you're freshest.
6. Put the needs of your audience first.
7. Every bit of content you create should be to please the customer or prospect — not your boss or client.
8. Start with empathy. Continue with utility. Improve with analytics. Optimize with love.
9. The first words of every sentence should make a friendly first impression to encourage the reader to keep going.
10. The primary idea — the important words — should be placed at the beginning.
11.  Anything you write should always be aligned with a larger (business or marketing) goal — even an individual blog post.
12. Reframe the idea to relate it to your readers.
13. The more personal you are, the more universal you become.
14. Write to one person.
15. If you get stuck, think about what's sticking. Do you need more research? More examples? Another point?
16. Good writing serves the reader, not the writer. It isn't self-indulgent. Good writing anticipates the questions that readers might have as they're reading a piece, and it answers them.
17. Empathy for the customer experience should be at the root of all of your content.
18. Start by getting to know your customers.
19. No one will ever complain that you've made things too simple to understand.
20. Don't tell me who you are — tell me why you matter to me.

Writing is a wonderful way to share what you know with important people around you. Become a better writer this year by reading Ann Handley's "Everybody Writes." I have already picked up a few new tips to use for my writing; I know you will, too.

And now I am off to the store to pick up some geraniums for my wife.

This article originally appeared in The Tennessean Newspaper.

My mother was an actress in London back in the 1960s. In 1967, one-hundred years after Canada got it's independence from Britain, the British returned in the form of my mum. She met my dad that summer, decided to permanently move to Toronto, got married, and had two ginormous babies. Needless to say, she shelved her acting career. 

After retirement, my mum chose to get back into acting. She joined a retired actors group, and she has been performing in plays and musicals ever since. My eighty-year-old mother is a big reason why I started performing improv again. 

My history with improv began with training at Second City in Toronto. After graduation, I moved to Ireland, where I started an improv troupe. Together we performed weekly shows that I always looked forward to. When I moved back to Toronto, I tried to get another troupe together but my attempts failed. So I gave up on improv altogether. 

My Passion for Performance

One of my biggest pleasures is to speak at conferences and events. I love sharing stories with actionable advice that help people move forward in their businesses and careers. I also love to entertain. 

Last year, I was invited to do a presentation at Hubspot's Inbound, which is a marketing conference in Boston. I felt like I would be preaching to the converted if my presentation was yet another one about marketing. So, I decided to do my talk about the lessons I have learned from studying and performing improvisation. My presentation, Improve with Improv, also inspired my mini ebook of the same name.

I have always had a deep love for reading, writing, watching, and performing comedy. Last summer, I read Judd Apatow's Sick In The Head, which features his inspiring interviews with many of the most famous comedians out there. The guest's stories in his book made me crave improv.

As I was online, I noticed an open audition announcement from Nashville Improv. On a whim, I decided to go and give it a shot. I didn't tell Heather or any of my friends that I was doing it. Next thing I knew, I had a callback to return for a second audition. As it turned out, I was accepted as a cast member in the company. 

OMG, I'm in an improv troupe again!

Each Monday night, I get to enjoy rehearsing improv with an impressive cast of actors and comedians. The company directors, Lacie Madison and Michael Kearney, are not only incredibly gifted people, but they are clearly passionate about improv and Nashville's thriving comedy community. So far, we have performed live together twice and tonight, I get to do it again (at Zanies at 8 pm, you should come).

Your turn. Now start.

I got back into improv for a few main reasons.

• I wanted to tap into another creative medium.
• I needed to get outside of my comfort zone.
• With a dad with dementia, I understand the importance of strengthening my brain.
• I understand that life is too short not to enjoy what makes us happy. 

What passions have you shelved for whatever reason? Take a moment now and jot them down on a piece of paper. Review what you wrote. Which of these passions would be okay to tap back into? Don't do it as a business move, do it as a gift to yourself. Now jot down a few steps it will take for you to get started. Now start.

Several months ago, I was enjoying dinner with a group of people. One of the guests ordered a vodka and Red Bull. A woman gasped as he began to sip his concoction. He stared at her curiously and asked if she had ever tasted the beverage. She explained she would never drink the stuff because of something she read on the internet. 

"Red Bull is made with bull semen."

The group of us laughed, and the woman became flushed. She insisted it was probably true because she saw it online. Her friend had sent her a link to the story. I politely introduced her to a website everyone needs to know about called Snopes.com.

Snopes is the definitive internet reference source for urban legends, folklore, myths, rumors, and misinformation. If you ever come across a story that seems too wild to be true, check Snopes. Check the story, especially before you share it.

I should add that Snopes is entirely independent and self-supporting; they receive no funding from any person, group, agency, or organization. 

Is Obama a liar? Is Trump a fake?

Want to know how that politician is performing? Would you like to see if that political rumor is true or not? Check Politifact.com before spreading the story.

PolitiFact is a fact-checking website that rates the accuracy of claims by elected officials and others who speak up in American politics. When you hear something on talk radio, TV, online, or at the watercooler, it's best to check its accuracy here first. 

Understand online and traditional media outlets are businesses. Sensationalist headlines always draw our attention. The more clicks, eyeballs, and eardrums they receive, the more money they earn from advertisers. 

Most sites and media outlets have biases and may even lean to one political side over another. It's no secret that Fox leans Republican, and MSNBC leans Democrat. It's up to you to recognize this before you amplify the "news" with your friends on Facebook.

When you share fake news you are part of the problem.

Don't be a red-faced, bull semen-sipping believer. Be responsible by checking the facts and source first. Spreading fake news and misinformation can not only make you look foolish, but it can also be downright dangerous. Less informed, more gullible people can act on rumors in horrible ways. 

I've included the latest stories and rumors below from Politifact and Snopes. Click through to learn more and to be informed. 

The Latest from Snopes and Politifact

Can't see the latest above? Click over to Snopes or Politifact directly.

The Red Bull bull semen rumor is totally fake, but the headline made you click to read this post, right? That's how they get us. ;)

I've written here before about the importance of transcribing the wisdom you consume. This is one of those blog posts. Chris Brogan is a prolific writer and thinker. His podcast, The Owner's Mind, is a mix of interviews and smart rambles. I love both formats. 

Chris recently released an episode where he spent time riffing on failure and success. He dropped so many pearls of wisdom that I had to keep stopping my walk with Max to take notes. Here's what I learned.

"Your excuses will never be as interesting as the story of how you got things done." 

One of the keys to success in business and in life is to start, start, and start again. When we start new projects we learn from the experiences. That knowledge brings us closer to success, so we must move forward and stop making excuses why we don't. As Chris said, "Your excuses will never be as interesting as the story of how you got things done." I love that!

Your persistence and promises will lead you to success. You need to focus on the promises that you make to yourself and to others. Have the strength to keep starting, but don't confuse being busy with progress. 

If you want to succeed you have to have successes. Starting can be fun, but we often don't love the follow through. If you are always starting something you are never finishing. The key is to make smaller goals and simpler wins. Feel that success and keeping pushing forward. 

Be sure to subscribe to Chris' killer email newsletter for more of his wisdom. 

What small wins can you achieve today? I just wrote a blog post. How about you?

We can easily forget what Thanksgiving is all about as we stuff ourselves with turkey, aggressively shop for deals, and argue politics with our family. Luckily, the keyword is right there in the name of the holiday to remind us what it's about - thanks.

We should be thankful all year, but we get distracted by our business, family, and Netflix. If we take the time each day of the year to be thankful, we will all be more kind and reflective. I feel like this is needed now more than ever.

As we ease to and away from Thanksgiving 2016 here are some fresh ideas on how to be thankful.

Be smart with your smartphone: Set a daily reminder asking, "What am I thankful for?" Stop your day to ask and answer this question to yourself during a quite moment. It will only take a minute and can quickly become a positive daily habit.

Journal it. Use a small notebook to jot down what you are thankful for each morning or before bed. This will become a valuable resource to turn to when you have a crummy day. Flip through it and realize you live a charmed life.

Walk and talk. Get outside and clear your head. I use the voice memo app on my iPhone to record why I am thankful. Don't worry the passersby will think you are speaking on your phone. Nobody will know you are secretly talking to yourself. It will be our little secret.

Say Thank You. Review your recent emails, voice messages, social media interactions and instant messages. There are people deserving of your thanks. Pick up the phone and tell them why you are thankful, or write them a personal note and mail it. There is magic in the tangible interactions.

The Cheater's Guide to Saying Thank You

I enjoyed watching Carly Slater's Ignite Seattle presentation, "The Cheater's Guide to Saying Thank You". In it, she suggests that instead of being thankful to someone, we should be thankful for them. This helps us realize exactly why we are grateful. It's great advice.

Take it a step further and acknowledge someone for something they care about. In her presentation, Slater says you can find what someone cares about by noting difficult or rare things they often do. Tell them you have noticed and why you are thankful for it. Take a moment now to consider the people in your network and what they care about.  

Don't let Thanksgiving be the only time you are giving thanks. Happy Thanksgiving (and belated to my Canadian friends). 

This article originally appeared in The Tennessean Newspaper.

I awoke to my phone buzzing this morning. My Facebook Messenger app was blowing up with activity. I hit the home button and was horrified by the news. Bob Goyetche had died. The voices in the private message group were from many people I hadn't heard from in ages. In fact, I hadn't talked to Bob in years outside of a few likes, tweets, and comments.

Bob Goyetche is a podcasting legend. Along with Mark Blevis, Bob co-hosted The Canadian Podcast Buffet. The show inspired hundreds of people to start their own podcasts. The podcast community they created taught me how to podcast, too. But it was much more than that.

Bob was a hugger

In 2006, Bob and Mark and their respective partners, Cat and Andrea, started an annual conference called Podcasters Across Borders (later "PAB"). I attended the conference in 2006 and 2007 and was instantly welcomed into the group. That was my first taste of meeting online friends offline and in person. Relationships truly grow when this occurs. There is nothing like handshakes, high-fives, and hugs. Bob was a hugger. 

Bob was a kind, generous, intelligent, sweet, hilarious guy. He was a podcasting mentor and a genuinely wonderful person. Not only does he leave behind countless friends, but he also leaves his family, Cat and Simon. My heart breaks for them both. 

Between the many messages in the Facebook group today, I listened to some of Bob's old podcast episodes. I was struck by the most recent episode of his solo ramble-cast, Bob Stuph. The lesson is timely but is also timeless. 

Consider Vulnerability

“Anger is not strength. Anger is a weakness. Vulnerability is strength.

We are often taught not to show weakness or any uncertainty. If you disagree, you do it vehemently and you protect your turf. This thinking builds walls.

You can change a conversation or a conflict by showing vulnerability. If both people agree to be vulnerable, the differing opinions can be put to a side and a connection can still be made. 

Showing vulnerability is difficult but will lead to amazing changes in your life. Consider vulnerability.” 

Today serves as a good reminder to reach out to those who have touched your life. Time goes too quickly. Bob left us too soon. 

R.I.P. Bob.

Networking isn’t just something you do during a conference. It is a process you must take part in before, during, and after the conference.

Effective networking leads to new business opportunities and new relationships. As I wrote in my book, New Business Networking, networking is paramount to your career and business.

10 Tips to Network Like a Pro at a Conference

1. Practice your elevator pitch

Practice your elevator pitch before you go. Who are you? What do you do? Why are you attending this conference?

You will be asked these questions, so rehearsing your answers ahead of time will help you prepare your thoughts. Plus, you might discover another reason why you are attending that you hadn’t considered.

2. Show up early

Try to get to the conference early, and stand near the registration table, entrance, or food area. These are the places where people congregate.

When you first arrive, solo attendees will especially be seeking a friendly connection. Don’t let them become wallflowers.

Also, consider approaching sponsors and introducing yourself. A casual conversation with a conference sponsor led to my book deal.

3. Express interest in others

Be more interested in other people than yourself.

4. Ask questions

Ask questions, and actively listen to the answers. Use eye contact and body language to show you are listening.

5. Talk to strangers

Forget what your parents taught you. Everyone is there for a similar reason. You are all sharing the same experience. A good icebreaker is to ask someone what they thought of a particular speaker or who was their favorite speaker of the day.

6. Be personable

Use a person’s first name several times as you are speaking to help you remember it.

7. Take notes

Take notes on a person’s business card about your conversation to refer to later. Can you help this person? Who should you introduce them to? Don’t forget to bring your cards, too.

8. Keep it fresh

Things can get stale during conferences. Bring mints and gum to keep your breath fresh.

9. Stay hydrated

Drink plenty of water, and go easy on the alcohol.

10. Stay connected

Follow up with each person you meet after the conference. Staying in touch is a crucial part of networking.

Follow up with a pleasant email, remind them what you spoke about, offer them a link to an interesting article, connect on LinkedIn, or schedule a “no agenda” coffee meeting.

Use my tips, and I guarantee you will have an amazing time at your next conference. Do you have your conference networking tip? Please leave a comment. 

Photo from Flickr by Cydcor

There are two precious resources all entrepreneurs swear by: time and money. With less time, we earn less money. When you work for yourself as a solo-practitioner or solopreneur, time is even more precious because you don't have a staff to assist you. Every hour should be accounted for in your workweek.

About six years ago, a close friend started his own business. We used to work together, but he decided to depart to start his own company. Our friendship faded because he could never commit to getting together for a coffee, lunch, or beer, like he used to. I couldn't understand this, but I understood once I started my company, Futureforth.

When you earn a paycheck you have more free time to socialize. When you work for yourself, you must consider whether that time will amount to new clients, customers, or something to benefit your fledging business. Yes, obviously we all need to fit in social time, but you won't grow your business if you are spending all of your time socializing. You also must beware of complacency when business is booming, all businesses have ups and downs.

I now get a little frustrated when I join someone for a coffee meeting only to learn that it is a social call and not something work related. Don't get me wrong, I love to socialize, but when I am seeking new clients, I must focus my time on business development and not casual coffee chatter. Free time is an oxymoron to an entrepreneur.

No Agenda

I recently set up a coffee meeting with an acquaintance I admire. He spends much of his time traveling for his business. He was home from London, but about to depart to New York in just a few days. Before he was back from London, I had reached out to ask him if he would like to join me for a coffee. In the email, I included two important words: no agenda.

Had I not used the words "no agenda", he might have anticipated my meeting request would lead to new work, or some form of professional collaboration. He might have ended up feeling disappointed, or worse, annoyed. I wouldn't blame him.

Time is a precious resource. During his few days between traveling, he probably had work to do and family to spend time with. Using "no agenda" told him that this was indeed a casual coffee meeting invitation, nothing more.

I believe that when planning social calls with fellow entrepreneurs we should add "no agenda". This lets the recipient know that this is strictly a casual meeting. I am writing this now because the gentleman pointed out how much he had appreciated my use of "no agenda". He knew from those two words that our meeting would strictly be a social call. I wasn't selling anything or buying anything. This was just an opportunity to chat and catch up with someone I admire.

Rather than risk disappointing or annoying your network, be clear on why you wish to meet with them in the first place. Respect their time and they will respect you. If there is a business opportunity to discuss, let them know. If it is just a friendly, catch-up coffee meeting use "no agenda".

This article originally appeared in The Tennessean Newspaper. Photo from Flickr by Pascal Maramis. 

Following a nun through Nashville... Since I Suppose from Oz Nashville. 

I just enjoyed a remarkable theatrical experience from Oz Nashville. Since I Suppose is an immersive journey through Nashville, with sound, film, interactions and text from Shakespeare's Measure For Measure. You should check out Amy Stumpfl's excellent recap from her article in The Tennessean. Audience members set out on their adventures using a mobile device and headphones. They are sworn to secrecy to ensure they don't spoil the experience for others, so I have to be careful not to spill any beans here. 

What was especially wonderful was the fact that I got to spend time in nooks and crannies around the city. I was fascinated by the way the interactive performance flowed from location to location. A dark and mysterious soundtrack played in my ears, as I watched the videos on the device. I had to follow the character on the display and listen to her dialogue as I merged through crowds of people on the streets. I was surprised and shocked by some of the locations I wound up in. It truly was a brilliantly immersive experience. 

Afterward, I asked Rus Snelling, Oz Nashville's production manager, a few questions. I was curious what would happen if a regular person on the street interfered with an audience member as they were meandering through back alleys. For example, I remember going on a ghost tour of Edinburgh. We traveled at night by foot through a spooky cemetery as drunken vagrants yelled at us to get out. Nervous audience members awkwardly chuckled, thinking (and hoping) they were part of the performance. Russ assured me that the company had undercover actors following along the whole time to ensure the audience is safe. In fact, the team also use private, direct messages via Twitter with a Tweetdeck dashboard to communicate with each other. 

So why is this blog post entitled, Why Waiting Is Wrong? Good question.

I chose the title because of the reaction I got from my friends when I shared how wonderful the experience was. Each person said they had been thinking about getting a ticket, but guess what, it was already too late. The entire show is sold out. My friends regretted missing their chance to buy a ticket because they waited too long. All theater performances have limited runs. Some shows are made to lasting longer, but if not enough tickets are sold, they eventually close. 

All good things must come to an end.

I had the wonderful fortune of being marketing manager for the Toronto production of the Broadway musical, HAIRSPRAY. The show had a successful run, but after nearly one year there were not enough bums in seats to keep the show alive. After it closed, I heard from many friends who said they were disappointed because they didn't get to see it. I was too. They waited too long and assumed the show would always be there. All good things must come to an end, but they didn't consider this.

If you are in Nashville (or plan to visit), take a look at the other amazing performances planned by OZ Nashville. Stop waiting and buy a ticket now, before you miss another opportunity for an experience of a lifetime.

This is why waiting is wrong. 

A few photos from the first BarCamp Nashville, August 18th, 2007. 

BarCamp Nashville, the free, technology unconference is celebrating its tenth year this Saturday, October 15th. If you have any interest in technology (and you should), you would be nuts to miss this celebration. 

My friend and co-founder, Marcus Whitney, recently wrote a wonderful recap blog post about how BarCamp Nashville came together. Our main goal was to put Nashville on the "digital map". We wanted the world to recognize the technology talent in our city. Our plan was to launch BarCamp and later PodCamp Nashville (now known as Craft Content), and pass the organizing torch to a new team each year.

CORRECTION: After our panel today, Marcus reminded me of the reason why we passed the torch. Originally, we had planned on doing the second BarCamp Nashville, but Marcus started his own company and decided not to do it. So Kelly Stewart (one of the original organizers) and I decided to pass the torch to the next group. Who knew my mind would be foggy after nearly ten years. 

The model has worked well. Each year a new person takes the lead of a specific task and the previous person becomes a mentor. For example, if one person manages sponsorships in 2016, the person who managed it in 2015 teaches them everything they need to know. It's been cool to notice how different people have changed roles over the years as they have learned new skills or wanted to test to new areas of interest.

Countless New Friends

I can't speak for each volunteer, but I can imagine that their experiences have led to new areas of expertise for their careers and businesses. Plus they have made new friendships with fellow volunteer organizers. I know that personally, I have made countless friends from my involvement as an early organizer and co-founder, and later as a speaker and fellow attendee.  

BarCamp Nashville was created by our community for our community. It is with deep thanks to all of the attendees and speakers who have made it an amazing event each year. I also want to thank the gracious sponsors who paid to make BarCamp happen. Finally, and most importantly, I want to raise a glass to toast all of the dedicated organizers who have continued to grow and nurture Nashville's original unconference.

BarCamp Nashville Organizer Roll Call (2007 - 2016)

Abby Whisenhut
Adam Auden
Alan Eatherly
Alan Fox
Alex Ezell
Alison Slamon
Andrew Duthie
Anna Stout
Ashley Bright
Audrey Hunter
Audrey Shores
Bart Renner
Bayard Saunders
Ben Wilburn
Berenice Valdes
Bob Kalwinsky
Bobby Brock
Brad Blackman
Brianna Reed
Bryan Duplantis
Cal Evans
Carla Swank Fox
Carter Harris
Catherine Hardin
Chad Taylor
Chase Ramsey
Chris Mihalcik
Chris Riesgo
Chuck Bryant
Clark Buckner
Cliff Corr
Colin Yearwood
Corey Davis
Courtenay Rogers
Courtney Seiter
Cristina Cinque
D'nelle Dowis
D'nelle Throneberry
Damon Romano
Dan Cotton
Dan Eggenschwiler
Dani Heileman
Dani Heilman Howell
Darren Crawford
David Beronja
David Payne
Dean Shortland
Deanna Vickers
Deborah Fisher
Deborah Sanderfur
Diane Sanders
Doris Palomino
Dustin Thomason
Edwin Acevedo
Elizabeth Elmore
Emily Fordice
Emma Everett
Eric Near
Eric Shuff
Erica Cosminsky
Erin Cubert
Erin McInnis
Erin Page
Gaines Kergosien
Hannah Moyer
Heather Venesile
Heidi Short
Jacques Woodcock
Jairo Ruiz
James Logan
Jamin Guy
Jenni Leeds
Jennifer Nash
Jessawynne Parker
Jessica Murray
Jessica Peoples
Jimmy Thorn
Joanne Eckton
Joe Smith
John Ellis
Jordan Kasper
Joseph Bradley
Josh Cole
Julia Corrigan
Julie McReynolds
Julie Moore Dey
Kailey Hussey
Kate O'Neill
Katherine Neunaber
Keith Miles
Kelly Stewart
Kenny Silva
Kerry Woo
Kim Hatcher
Knight Stivender
LaCheka Phillips
Laurie Kalmanson
Les Gebhardt
Lesley Smith
Lindsey McMurray
Lisa French
Lucas Hendrickson
Marc Apple
Marcus Snyder
Marcus Whitney
Marissa Benchea
Mark Rowan
Mark Williams
Marshall Romero
Mary Carnahan
Mary Kergosien
Mathew Laughlin
Matthew Jackson
Max Trenkle
Maynard Garrett
Melanie Friebel
Melanie Meadows
Michael Daugherty
Michael Morton
Michelle Price
Michelle Ward
Mike Conrad  
Mike Logsdon
Miller Canning
Nayeli Anaya Hernandez
Neil McCormick
Nicholas Holland
Nipun Joshi
Paul Sunderhaus
Penny Cupp
Rachael Kahne
Rob Wingfield
Robin Thorpe
Russell Campbell
Sam Bradley
Samantha Yeargin
Scot Justice
Scott Greer
Scott Troutman
Sean Hill
Steve Cunningham
Sue Anne Reed
Tabitha Tune
Thomas Vaughn
Tina Wisneski
Todd O’Neill
Tom Cheredar
Tony Grotticelli
Winston Hearn

Did I miss you? Sorry about that. Please leave me a comment. 

Join Us This Saturday

Marcus and I will be hosting an interactive question and answer session with each other and the audience on Saturday. We hope to see you at our session, A look back (and forward) at BarCamp Nashville. Check out all of the other amazing sessions planned too! All for free. 

Happy 10th BarCamp Nashville. 

My creative struggle is caused by an abundance of consumption. I have written here before about procrastination through education. I feel like I often get stuck by consuming too much and not creating enough.

It's time to do your own thing.

Today, as I walked Max, I listened to Mitch Joel's Six Pixels of Separation podcast. I have been a fan of Mitch since the early days of podcasting, he's a smart cookie and great guy. In episode 531 of his podcast, Mitch interviewed Srinivas Rao from the Unmistakable Creative podcast. They had a brilliant conversation that got me thinking about how we all consume too much without enough action. You can listen to the show below. 

It is wonderful to listen to podcasts and read blog posts, articles, and books, but we must fit in time to create. That's where we drop the ball so often. I do this too!

I remember trying to quit smoking so many times (I eventually did). The lie would always be that I will quit after this pack. The same can be said for the content we consume compared with what we fail to create. I'll write the blog post after reading this book. I'll produce the podcast after I listen to these episodes. I'll create the presentation after I watch a few more. 

We deny the world what we are capable of.

Mitch and Srinivas also spoke about hero worship. They talked about how our own intuition and instincts are denied because we want to be so much like someone else we admire. In being this way we deny the world what we are capable of doing and contributing. Srinivas said that if you listen to a certain set of podcasts, you will hear the same guests saying the same things on every single show. We need to break this echo chamber.

Go out and create something only you can create. Stop following step by step directions and best practices because this absolves you of risk. Take some risk. Be inspired by people you admire and what they create, but take the time to DO YOUR OWN THING. Release your ideas to the world. 

I'm working on something new too, it involves improv. I'll share more about that here soon.

What are you going to create? Leave a comment, I'd love to hear from you.

My long-time, personal newsletter subscribers will attest, I have struggled to find my writing voice in the past. I'm thankful people like Chris Brogan are around to inspire me to be authentic by sharing what's on my mind. My wonderful subscribers have taken note, I have seen the difference in all of the replies I receive from each of my newsletters these days. Finding my voice has been a journey and Chris has certainly inspired me along the way. 

Chris Brogan will help you find your voice.

Chris and I have been long-time friends since my first Podcast New Media Expo in 2007. We also hung out on Twitter together quite regularly back in the heyday. Chris has always brought a refreshing breath of truth to everything he has written. I am a fan of all of his work, his personal newsletter, his blog, and his New York Times best-selling books. He is a master at helping people find their voice.

Chris' ninth book, Find Your Writing Voice: How to write more like your amazing self, for books, blog posts, and email is an instant hit in my opinion. He takes no time to get to the nitty gritty in this short, self-help book for people who want to write authentically. The following are ten takeaways from Find Your Writing Voice that will help you find your voice. Consider these as you start to scribble your next blog post.

10 tips to help you find your writing voice.

1. Write with your destination in mind.

2. Your voice will come to you the more you practice.

3. Write ten ideas every day. Shout out to James Altucher here.

4. Assign yourself to write 300 words each day.

5. Remember you are writing for one person. 

6. Read it out loud.

7. You have to talk about your topics in original ways.

8. Use small words, unless it's vital that you use big ones.

9. When you write to please someone other than yourself, you set yourself up for failure.

10. Be someone with an opinion.

I highly recommend you download a copy of Chris Brogan's Find Your Writing Voice. Chris goes into more details on each point above. He also breaks down how he strategically composes his blog posts, newsletters, and books. Readers are also invited to join a private Facebook Group to share with one another. 

If you are ready to find your voice and want people to discover your writing, you need to grab this quick read.

You know those people who you meet who you can tell are good people. Joe Calloway is one of those guys. Joe helps organizations focus on what is truly important, inspires constant improvement, and motivates people to immediate action (I stole that from his site). Jos is the author of nine books, a business coach, and a keynote speaker.  

Joe and I met for a coffee a while back, and we instantly hit it off. His long career as a speaker, consultant, and writer has certainly inspired me to keep pushing forward, even when the going gets rough. It gets rough sometimes. Anyone who says it doesn't is a liar; don't trust them. 

I recently reached out to Joe to check in and to say hello. Just a day after our email exchange, a package arrived at my door. I was excited to find a sweet letter and his latest book, Keep It Simple: Unclutter Your Mind to Uncomplicate Your Life.

Just as the title suggests, Keep It Simple is a short and simple book about simplifying your life. I highly recommend picking up a copy for yourself. I’m going to buy a few to give to friends who need to simplify things in their own lives, too. 

10 Joe Calloway Quotes That Will Inspire Simplicity

The following are ten quotes from Keep It Simple. Use these to start moving yourself in the right direction by simplifying your business, career, and life.  

"In order to get to simplicity, you have to have focus."

"Focus means clarity. Clarity means knowing what is most important."

"Getting focused is the path to simplicity, and simplicity is the path to success and fulfillment."

"Successful people have the ability to make the complicated simple."

"Our goal should always be to do that which creates value for our customers."

"As we simplify, we increase the likelihood of success."

"Complication freezes you into uncertainty and inaction."

"The quality of your life is largely determined by the quality of your relationships."

In addition to the inspiring ideas in his book, Joe recommends several thought-provoking exercises. Two of my favorites are the following.

"Create a “let-go-of list”. There is great wisdom and power in this idea, as you can’t accomplish the things you aspire to until you clear the space for them to happen."

"Think about every person in the past three days that has made a favorable impression on you. What was the common factor?"

I highly recommend picking up this little gem and putting it to work for yourself. Leave me a comment if you do, I'd love to hear your thoughts.

My friend came over the other day to help me repair a broken showerhead. The shower had been out of commission for months. Six months ago, I decided to try to fix it. I'm not particularly handy.

I did quite well with my repair job but was stuck when I couldn't fasten the showerhead pipe enough to make it point down instead of up. I had ideas to rectify the problem, but I was worried I would strip the thread and break the pipe. So I left it. For six months.

I feared I would break it because I didn't believe in myself. I didn't have the confidence.

My friend's dad is a handy man too. Those talents are passed down from generation to generation. I don't recall ever seeing my dad with a hammer or screwdriver. In addition to no handy inspiration, he also cursed me.

My dad famously once exclaimed, "If someone is going to f*** up, it's going to be Dave." He might have said it more than once, but regardless it stuck in my mind like a white-hot bull brand.

Bull, it took me years to realize it was bull. Heather taught me that. My dad was a prick to me growing up. I was a prick too, but he was the parent, so he earned much higher marks in the prick department.

I think of this constantly with my kids. I can't fool them into thinking I'm a talented handyman, but I can empower them to believe that they can be. That's what I strive for. I'm not a perfect parent (nobody is), but I am always careful not to put them down.

If you have little people in your life, think before you speak. Do the same when conversing with your employees, or friends, or anyone seeking feedback. That line my dad fed me (and my friend who witnessed my embarrassment) slowed my personal progress for many years. It still sticks with me today. 

Be careful with your words

My mum once had a fridge magnet that read, "Love is remembering an unkind word can hurt." It's a good reminder for us all. Be careful with your words. Once they are said, they can only be forgiven, not forgotten.

If you struggle with self-doubt, know that you are not alone. In fact, everyone does to some degree. My old friend, John Morgan, shared some great tips on overcoming self-doubt here.

Photo from Flickr by Frédéric Glorieux.

I'm a fan of Paul Jarvis. I've enjoyed his Sunday Dispatches email newsletter for sometime now. His message resonated with me this week (as it often does). In his email he wrote,

"The problem I’ve personally come up against lately is that thinking up these new ideas, new products and new models is a little addictive. At least to me. And now I realize that I’ve let my business get far too unfocused."

I am in the same boat. What's really challenging is working for myself. When I earned a steady paycheck, I could work on side projects whether they earned money or not. Most of them didn't, but that wasn't my intention. Now that I work for myself, I'm completely accountable for my time (and money).

I am absolutely dying to start a new podcast. I know what I want it to be, I know the guests I want to have on it, but it comes down to two things: time and money.

I figured out that my last podcast took me about four hours for each thirty-minute episode each week. That time included my guest research, lining up interviews, conducting interviews, editing the podcast, producing show notes, and promoting each episode. Aside from a few sponsors, the show didn't earn much money, so I had to kill it. I needed to focus on Futureforth, so I could be sure my family was being fed.

I have many new ideas for new meet-ups similar to my previous ones. I want to start a small, private mastermind group (message me if you're interested). I've been sitting on a conference idea for years. I had a new book idea, but realized it wouldn't land me consulting or speaking work, which means it wouldn't earn enough money. You get the idea.

Money, money, money...

Money, money, money... why does everything have to be about money? Because every minute of my day is on me. Because I have to feed my family. Because I want us to be able to afford the richest experiences (not things).

Did I solve this dilemma in this blog post? No. Maybe you have some ideas. I'll keep you posted on developments here.