As this year winds down, I’ve been thinking a lot about gratitude not in the generic, seasonal way, but in a very personal, grounded sense. When I look back at the last twelve months, one thing rises above everything else: the people in my life who said yes. The old and new friends who made time for a coffee. The kind people who introduced me to someone in their network. The good souls who picked up the phone, replied to an email, or opened a door I couldn’t have opened alone.

I’ve always believed that a strong network isn’t about quantity. It’s about the quality of the relationships that truly see you, support you, and help you grow.

Pioneering insight meditation teacher Joseph Goldstein, who helped bring Theravada mindfulness practice to the West, reminded me of this in a profound way this year. When he agreed to join me for a conversation for my Wise Squirrels podcast, I was both giddy and grateful. What struck me most wasn’t just his presence or his wisdom, but his generosity and good humor. His agreement for an interview reaffirmed something I’ve always known but sometimes forget: we learn to be better humans through the ways we show up for one another, and when things aren’t going well, like in distracted moments in meditation, we simply must begin again.

And that’s been the lesson of my year.

While I’ve spent a lot of time working on my business, coaching clients, and learning from my own coaches, therapists, and podcast guests, I’ve realized something essential: I cannot and should not do any of this alone. I’m a solopreneur on paper, but in reality, it takes a village. Helpful conversations have helped me ponder possibilities where I previously saw obstacles. Without friends and my fantastic wife, Heather — and all the people who quietly invest in me — my work wouldn’t be possible.

This was also my second year understanding what I now call my “operating system.” I’m grateful to my friend who encouraged me to get tested for ADHD, because everything that came afterward led me to learn to give myself grace.

Treat people the way you want to be treated.

For years, I taught my kids the golden rule: treat people the way you want to be treated. It’s still true. But I now understand something more profound: if you don’t know yourself, you can’t accept yourself, and without self-acceptance, it’s nearly impossible to treat yourself with love and respect. And when we don’t treat ourselves well, it becomes harder to embody that golden rule with others fully.

Looking ahead, my intention is simple: I want to continue providing value to the people who enter my life. Maybe that’s an introduction. Maybe it’s guidance when someone asks for it. It’s also patience, kindness, and knocking it out of the park for my coaching and speaking clients. But above all, I will continue to lead with acceptance and empathy.

And to you — reading this, supporting my work, subscribing, listening, or simply staying connected — thank you. Truly. Your presence in my world means more than you might realize. Every email, comment, and text all add up to indicate I’m doing good work.

If there’s one thing I hope you take away from this, it’s this: slow down and savor the people in your life. The conversations, the friendships, the mentors, the clients, the ones who say yes, old and new friends. These people shape us as much as anything we achieve.

Here’s to a year of gratitude, connection, and showing up — for ourselves and for each other.

We can easily forget what Thanksgiving is all about as we stuff ourselves with turkey, aggressively shop for deals, and argue politics with our family. Luckily, the keyword is right there in the name of the holiday to remind us what it's about - thanks.

We should be thankful all year, but we get distracted by our business, family, and Netflix. If we take the time each day of the year to be thankful, we will all be more kind and reflective. I feel like this is needed now more than ever.

As we ease to and away from Thanksgiving 2016 here are some fresh ideas on how to be thankful.

Be smart with your smartphone: Set a daily reminder asking, "What am I thankful for?" Stop your day to ask and answer this question to yourself during a quite moment. It will only take a minute and can quickly become a positive daily habit.

Journal it. Use a small notebook to jot down what you are thankful for each morning or before bed. This will become a valuable resource to turn to when you have a crummy day. Flip through it and realize you live a charmed life.

Walk and talk. Get outside and clear your head. I use the voice memo app on my iPhone to record why I am thankful. Don't worry the passersby will think you are speaking on your phone. Nobody will know you are secretly talking to yourself. It will be our little secret.

Say Thank You. Review your recent emails, voice messages, social media interactions and instant messages. There are people deserving of your thanks. Pick up the phone and tell them why you are thankful, or write them a personal note and mail it. There is magic in the tangible interactions.

The Cheater's Guide to Saying Thank You

I enjoyed watching Carly Slater's Ignite Seattle presentation, "The Cheater's Guide to Saying Thank You". In it, she suggests that instead of being thankful to someone, we should be thankful for them. This helps us realize exactly why we are grateful. It's great advice.

Take it a step further and acknowledge someone for something they care about. In her presentation, Slater says you can find what someone cares about by noting difficult or rare things they often do. Tell them you have noticed and why you are thankful for it. Take a moment now to consider the people in your network and what they care about.  

Don't let Thanksgiving be the only time you are giving thanks. Happy Thanksgiving (and belated to my Canadian friends). 

This article originally appeared in The Tennessean Newspaper.